I have to confess, I’ve not always been enamoured with the ideologies underpinning the dual conflicts against the Terminids and Automatons inHelldivers 2. Don’t get me wrong, I love Super Earth, but I’m satisfied with my acre of land back home, I’m happy to let our planet’s enemies live undisturbed in their systems. I’m no dissident, but I don’t believe everything I hear in the video reports, either.
Unfortunately, I’m not a high-level citizen and we all know that service guarantees citizenship, so I signed up for the Helldivers to earn my lot. I disagree with Super Earth’s violent methods of colonisation, so I hardened my resolve and chose a career of conscientious objection and pacifism - then I queued up for quickplay.
I’m Worried Helldivers 2 Isn’t Going To Last
Comedic deaths are fun and all, but that only lasts until you git gud.
I didn’t want to provide my allies with tools of destruction either so I figured the appropriate stratagem loadout for an aspiring pacifist is the Supply Pack, Orbital Smoke Strike, Orbital EMS Strike and Shield Generator Relay. I wasn’t interested in fighting, but I could still keep my fellow Helldivers safe from harm.
A Surprisingly Viable Strategy (Sometimes)
The first mission was an extermination mission, thankfully one of the easiest missions in Helldivers 2. The whole thing took less than five minutes. I wandered around, dropping shield generators on my two fellow soldiers and resupplying them with ammo when necessary. With only a couple of casualties, the whole thing went off without a hitch.
If my comrades Knowt and Gaggle realised I finished with 0 damage and 5 shots fired (this is erroneous, but the Helldivers 2 post-mission stats aren’t the most accurate), then they didn’t mention it. In fact, Gaggle thanked me for the game and said he had to go eat dinner, before pulling me into a warm embrace.
Helldivers 2 Players Are Angry With ‘Farmers’ Costing Them The War
They’re handing this war to the Automatons.
I hot-dropped into my next mission, a trio had completed their satellite uplink objectives and were looking to extract. They seemed to have everything well in hand so I provided support as best I could. I helped them evacuate and made sure everything ran smoothly. When I provided stims to heal their wounds, they saluted me in appreciation. Perhaps there really is a place for pacifism in the fight for Super Earth. Another 0 damage mission in the books.
The host ended up dropping the game after the mission but I wasn’t kicked, so that’s something, right? I find it funny that I played so many missions as a pacifist when community forums are awash with solo players complaining about being kicked from every lobby.
The Unturnable Tides Of Battle
My third and final mission didn’t go as hot. I joined a squad who had already lost control of their buttons in an evacuation mission. If you’ve played a couple of high-level evacuation missions, you know that losing control of the buttons that release civilians is pretty much a death sentence. My first supply pack drop also wiped out one of my teammates which was… less than ideal.
I managed to separate from the pack and sneak a couple of civilians to safety while everyone else was fighting. In the end, though, as is typical with these missions we ended up being pushed back to the jungle where all of us met grisly fates one by one. Our last remaining soldier SoulDragon managed to extract after a predictable mission failure. There were no hard feelings among the team afterwards, though.
That was the end of my experience as a conscientious objector. I was pleasantly surprised by how nice the community was to me despite what is essentially low-level griefing. After my decorated service, I was allowed to return to Super Earth and live out my life on my acre of land, or that’s what the video announcements say and as we all know, everything Super Earth tells you is true. Always remember — dissidents will be punished.
